A/C a saga / A/C never ending drama

Depois de quase uma semana sem ar condicionado, tendo pesadelos horriveis e dormindo na sala para não cozinhar na estufa que o segundo andar da casa virou, o tecnico do A/C finalmente veio.

Toca o telefone
- Alo
- Oi. Você está em casa?
- ???
- Aqui é da empresa de consertos de ar condicionado.
- Ah! To sim.
- Posso mandar alguém agora?
- Não. Eu queria ficar pelo menos mais um mês vivendo nessa sauna infernal. Não penso em outra coisa. Por favor, mande o cara agora!

Batem na porta

- Oi! Você veio salvar a minha vida e impedir que eu derreta?
- Hehe...espero que sim.
E já vai entrando, quando eu o interrompo:
- Você se importa de colocar essa capinha de sapato, pra nao empestear sujar o meu carpete recem lavado?
- Claro! Claro!
Ele sobe e declara que o problema é o termostato, que não está funcionando.
- Estava funcionando até ontem. Não é o termostato.
O termostato é consertado "magicamente" e ele pede para evr a caixa de fusiveis, que fica lá fora.
Nenhum fusivel derrubado. ( o que eu já sabia e já tinha dito pra ele).
Ele sobe pro segundo andar. esquece as escadas, vai buscar na van. Quando volta, perdeu o protetor de botina suja que eu tinha dado pra ele. Vai no carro buscar outra ( agora se o fofo tinha o bagulhinho, por que não se ofereceu pra usar?? Será que a mulher dele tem uma empresa de limpar carpetes?)
Antes de subir no forro, ele percebe que esqueceu o pano de colocar embaixo da escada para proteger o carpete. pego um pra ele, para economizar um pouco de tempo.
Ele sobe no forro da casa.
- É problema com a eletricidade. Não tá vindo eletricidade aqui.
Eu bem sei que não é verdade, por que já tinha chamado o pessoal de uma outra empresa de ar condicionado, antes de pensar que eu podia usar o meu "seguro casa nova" pra isso, e eles me disseram que o circuit board estava queimado.
Eu só não podia falar nada, para que eo fofo nao dissesse que como alguém já tinha ido lá mexer ele nao poderia fazer nada a respeito... Fiquei na minha. roendo unha e pensando palavrões bem feios.
- Como é problema com a eletricidade e nós não somos uma empresa de eletricidade, eu nao posso fazer nada.
- Não é problema com a eletricidade. Eu já chamei os eletricistas. - menti deslavadamente
Lá vai ele olhar a caixa de fuziveis lá fora, e volta dizendo que tinha "consertado' o problema eletrico.
O cara sobe de novo no forro
- Olha, trocaram o seu circuit board no outro AC. pode ser que seja isso
- Hmmmm
- É isso! É isso!!
A essa hora eu já queria dar um tapa nele.
- E você vai consertar agora, né? por que eu estou há uma semana sem ar condicionado.
- Ah não vai dar. preciso da autorizaçao, e depois comprar uma peça nova... só amanhã.
Já aprendi que não adianta espernear. Se eu brigar com o fulano, ele aparece aqui daqui a uma semana.
Ele sai do forro e já vai indo embora.
- O senhor pode por favor fechar a portinhola do forro?
- Claro! Claro! Desculpa
Ele pega a escada, vai pro primeiro andar e vai embora.
Minutos depois toca a minha campainha. É ele com a escada debaixo do braço:
- Desculpa. Esqueci as minhas anotações no forro.
Sobe, pega as anotaçoes, desce com as escadas, vai embora.
Eu me sento no sofá, a campainha toca de novo:
- Desculpa. Eu preciso receber 60 dolares de você, pela visita.
- Já paguei. paguei na hora de marcar a visita.
- Ah! Muito obrigada. Até amanhã...

Até amanhã!!!

Como nem eu estou mais aguentando essa palhaçada, vou resumir o que aconteceu depois disso.
Ninguém me ligou durante o resto do dia. Quandoe u liguei para confirmar que horas eles viriam no dia seguinte, fui informada que ninguém sabia de nada.
Depois de muitas ligaçoes, choro, gritos e um edsespero só, me disseram que a peça do ar condicionado vai chegar em 21 dias.
Fui dormir aos soluços. Depois de tanta briga, de tanto problema com tudo, eu já não tinha mais forças para nada. Cheguei ao meu limite.
Fabio decidiu que não dava pra esperar o seguro resolver o problema, ligou para outra compania e marcou deles virem solucionar o problema. Ia custar uma grana.
Meu agente imobiliário ficou com pena, moveu céu e terra, falou com todos os contatos dele, inclusive o Vice Presidente da empresa de seguros  e magicamente a peça apareceu e vieram consertar o ar condicionado pela manhã.

Minhas filhas chegam a noite!

++++++++++++++++++++++

After almost a week without air conditioning,sleeping in the living room, having horrible nightmares the A / C guy finally came.

The phone rings
- Hello
- Hey, are you home?
-??
- I am the AC guy.
- Ah! Yes, I am home.
- Can I have someone coming over  now?
- No. I wanted  at least another month living in hell. Sure, I am waiting.

I hear a Knock on the door

- Hi! You came to save my life and prevent me from melting?
- Hehe ... I hope so.
And he is coming in, when I interrupt:
- Do you mind using the shoe cover, to protect my new carpets?
- Of course! Sure!
He investigates and declares that the problem is the thermostat that is not working.
- The thermostat was working until yesterday. That's not it.
The thermostat is repaired "magically" and he asks to see the fuse box.
I had already checked it, nothing wrong with the fuses - but he checked it for himself and decided there was nothing wrong there.
He goes to second floor ( where the problem was all along). He forgets the ladder, go back to get in the van. When he returns, he has no shoe protection, so he needs to go back to the van and get another one.
And it went like this for a while. He forgot the blanket to put under the ladder and protect my carpet, forgot his tool box, forgot everything at least once.
After a while, he has a verdict:
- The problem is with the electricity. There is no power coming to your AC
I know that is not true, because I had called someone else to check on the AC, before I realized I had an insurance policy that would cover it.
Our circuit board was burnt - I wonder how long until he realises it.
- Because the problem is with electricity and we are not a power company, I can not do anything.
- It is not an electrical problem. I called the electricians before calling you ( I lied)
A little later he comes back saying he "fixed"the electrical problem. This is the second imaginary problem he fixes today.
- Look, they have changed the circuit board in the other AC. it may be that
- Hmmmm
- That's it! That's it!
This time I've wanted to slap him.
- And you'll fix it now, right? I had no AC for a week.
- Oh, I won't be able to. I need an authorization form,, and then someone needs to buy a new piece ... I can only fix it tomorrow. First thing tomorrow.
He makes a couple of other boo boos ( forgets to close the attic door, then forgets his notes, leaves his ladder is the house, comes back for it...)

I will summarize what happened after that because no one needs to deal with all this crap.
Nobody called me for the rest of the day. When I called to confirm what time they would come the next day, I was informed that no one knew anything about it. the guy was new and not very aware of the procedures.
After lots of tears, i found out the part that was missing would take 21 days to arrive.
I went to bed sobbing. I was exhausted, I had no more fight in me.
Fabio decided to call a private company, as it would be unbearable to survive with no AC under 47 degrees.
It would cost us money, but some things we just have to do and not think too much about it.
My real estate agent took pity on us, moved heaven and earth, spoke to all his contacts, including the Vice President of the insurance company and the piece magically appeared the same morning.
In a couple of hours we had a functioning AC.

Está chovendo! It is raining

Dentro de casa!
Fabio e eu fomos limpar o banheiro das meninas e fizemos o maior faxinão. Limpamos, esfregamos e  lavamos tudo, inclusive a banheira delas.
Exaustos, deitamos no sofá para descansar e quando eu resolvi descer pra tomar uma aguá, dei de cara com uma cachoeira privada, no meio da sala!
Corremos esvaziar a banheira, mudar a mesa, secar o chão... e esperar até segunda para ver se o bendito seguro vai ou nao vai cobrir mais essa surpresinha!

++++

It is raining inside my house.
Fabio and I decided to clean the girls bathroom. We cleaned, scrubbed and washed everything, including the bath tub.
When we were done, we dropped dead in front of the Tv and relaxed a bit, but when i went downstairs to get some water to drink, I found my very own waterfall, coming down the dining room ceiling...
I am not sure I have the energy to keep dealing with so many things going wrong.
We emptied the tub, moved the furniture, dried the floors... and now we have to wait until Monday, to see if the insurance will or will not cover the repairs!

Móveis/ Furniture

Nessa bagunça toda, a unica loja que não me deu nenhum problema foi a loja de móveis.

Comprei todos os nossos móveis na Pruitts. Eles marcaram um dia e um horário para a entrega, apareceram pontualmente, montaram tudo e saíram sem deixar nenhuma bagunça.

Eu estava procurando um web site para deixar comentários elogiosos, mas com tanta coisa dando errado, acabei deixando para depois.

Sem ar condicionado, cansados e um tanto de saco cheio, fabio e eu fizemos um jantarzinho gostoso e nos sentamos para o nosso primeiro jantar na fervente casa nova.

Quando eu me sento, sinto uma dor estranha na perna. Imagina a minha surpresa quando vejo que a pele está cortada e a perna está sangrando.

Os super eficientes montadores deixaram preguinhos na parte de baixo da mesa.

Todo mundo comemora. Êêêê...

Mais um mico prá eu ter que resolver na segunda feira.

Ligo pra Lia:

- Filha, vou ter que tomar uma antitetânica.

- Por que?

- Cortei a perna nuns pregos enferrujados

- Não esquenta não mãe. A gente tomou anti tetânica quando saia "catando cachorro de rua".

 Na segunda feira, liguei prá loja e pedi para falar com o vendedor:

Conto a história, ele morre de se desculpar e diz qua vai mandar alguém arrancar os pregos.

Digo que não precisa, mas que isso é um absurdo. Uma palhaçada.

Ele concorda e insiste em mandar alguém.

Me transfere para marcar a vinda dos arrancadores de prego, que estarão disponíveis daqui a uma semana.

Tô louca?

Além de tudo vou esperar uma semana para arrancarem os pregos? 

Sem ar condicionado, dormindo na sala, mal acomodada e toda torta, ainda vou ter que comer no chão ou me cortar toda refeição?

Mando chamar o fulano outra vez e pergunto pra ele se ele acha que esse plano tem cabimento.

Ele me manda $50 dolares pelo correio pela inconveniência...

**********

In this whole mess, the only store that did not give me any trouble was the furniture store. 

I bought all our furniture in Pruitts. They booked the day and time for delivery, showed up punctually, assembled everything and left without leaving a mess.  

I was so impressed I was looking for a web site to post rave reviews, but with so much going wrong in all other aspects of our move, I ended up delaying it.
With no  air conditioning, tired and sleeping in a very uncomfortable sofa, Fabio and I decided to cook a nice dinner and relax a bit.

When I sat, I felt a strange pain in one of my legs. Imagine my surprise when I saw it was bleeding too. 

The "super efficient" assemblers  left nails under the table.
Another issue for me to deal with on Monday...

In the main time, i call Lia:
- I will have to take a tetanus shot. 

- Why? 

- I cut my leg in some rusty nails 

- Don't worry, mum. We took anti tetanus shots when we were out catching stray dogs in Bahrain.

 On Monday, I called practical store and asked to speak to the sales guy. 

I tell my story, he  apologizes and says he will send someone to pluck the nails. 

I tell him not to, this is nonsense. I can take the nails off.
He insists on sending someone over and transfers me to book the plucking nails visit...in a week.

Am ICrazy? 

Who would wait a week to get some nails off? 

With no AC, sleeping on the sofa in the living room, why would i also decide to eat on the floor until these people show up? 

I get the sales man on the phone once again... and ask him if he thinks his brilliant plan makes any sense...

He sends me a $ 50 cheque by mail for the inconvenience ...

MUDAMOS! We finally moved!

Depois de todo o bafafá para deixar a casa em ordem para poedrmos mudar, o dia "D" finalmente chegou e nós viemos de mala e cuia para a casa nova.
Os móveis novos estão aqui, os eletrodomésticos estão aqui e estão funcionando. Ainda há muito trabalho pela frente, ma so pior já passou, né?
...e aí Murphy me escuta e chuta o pau da bararca com gosto...
O ar condicionado do segundo andar da casa simplesmente pifou. Isso mesmo, o segundo andar, onde ficam os quartos. Todos os quartos da casa.
O detalhe é que a temperatura tem chegado a 47 graus todos os dias. Temperatura suficiente para assar os amis desavisados.
Eu imediatamente chamei o pessoal que eu contratei para fazer a manutenção anual do ar condicionado. Em poucas horas o funcionário veio e diagnosticou o problema: circuit board queimado . Nada que 500 doletas não resolvam.
Gelei. 500 paus? Assim?
Aí me lembrei que nós compramos um seguro para a casa nova. É mais ou menos uma garantia contra "m".
Agradeci o cara e pedi pra ele esperar eu ligar. Eu ia tentar resolver esse babado sem gastar dinheiro que nem tenho.
Ligo pro pessoal do seguro. Uma moça muito bem educada e muito atenciosa me avisa que a apolice infelizmente não cobre ar condicionados.
Meu coração para de bater por uns instantes.Nós fizemos o seguro exatamente por que o A/C é de 2003 e essas coisas sao caras quando enguiçam. Sem contar o detalhe da temperatura de Phoenix, que derrete qualquer coisa.
Antes que eu tivesse um surto, saisse gritando rua afora, meu agente imobiliário tomou as redeas da situação de descobriu que eu posso ligar lá e adicionar o ar condicionado á minha apolice, se eu pagar uma quantia pequena. Assim que eu fizer isso, eu já posso pedir pra eles consertarem o ar. Essa opc'~ao é valida por 30 dias depois que você compra a casa nova. Ainda estamos no prazo.
Só tem um detalhezinho:
O escritório fecha pro fim de semana. Essa adição só vai poder ser feita na segunda.
Hoje é sexta, pouco depois das 6 da tarde...
Vamos passar o fim de semana na fornalha!

After all the ordeal with the renovations and all the unexpected stuff that happened, we finally moved into our beautiful new home.

Our furniture is here, our appliances were delivered and are now installed. There is still lots of work to be done, but nothing can go wrong now, right?

...and that's when Murphy hears you and decides to prove you wrong.

The air condition unit that serves the second floor of the house (where all the bedrooms are), decided not to work any longer.

Do I need to remind you it is currently 47 degrees in Phoenix ? And that we will cook alive?

I called to A/C inspector who was over in a couple of hours and detected the problem pretty easily. our power board blew up.

He would go out, get a new piece, come back and install it for us. Nothing 500 dollars would not cover.

Wait! Wait! Wait!

I have a home guarantee policy to cover exactly this kind of incident disaster.

I called them, a very friendly lady explained to me my warranty does not cover air conditioners.

My heart skipped a beat.

We had it done Exactly because the air conditioner is from 2003 and we never know what can happen to these things, specially in a hot, hot, hot place like Arizona.

Before I panicked my amazing real state agent took control of the situation, called them and found out we can pay an extra fee and had it added to the policy...and claim back on it straight away.

We are only able to do that because it has been only 30 days since we took possession of the property.

It will be a very hot weekend, but we will survive. 

All good, all fun, but this option is only available when the office opens, on Monday. Today is Friday, just passed 6 pm.

A família Ramalho Rocha ataca de novo / Our family does it again

Nós somos uma família que viaja bastante, certo? Vivo ouvindo as pessoas dizerem que nós somos cidadãos do mundo, que cada hora estamos num lugar, que isso, que aquilo.
E vira e mexe venho eu aqui, contas os nossos barracos de viagem. Parece que a gente não aprende mesmo!
E hoje, aprontamos de novo. Em grande estilo.
Anita veio ficar 10 dias aqui em bahrain e hoje era o seu voo de volta ao Brasil.
Choradeiras, abraços e despedidas doloridas, fomos para o aeroporto.
A mocinha do guichê olhava, olhava e não achava a reserva.
Como eu sou mal educada, impaciente, já estava ficando um tanto alvoroçada. Minutos depois vem a bomba:
- O vôo dela é no mês que vem. 25 de maio, não de abril.
Confirmamos o ticket : 25 de maio. E o pior é que o vôo estava totalmente lotado!
Lá vamos nós correr atrás do prejuízo amanhã...
++++++++++++++++++

We travel a lot, we are always coming and going, so we know exactly what to do when travelling, right?
Wrong!
Today we took Anita to the airport, after she spent 10 days with us.
At the check in, the lady could not find her reservation. I was getting impatient, when she finally found it:
Anita's ticket was issued incorrectly and none of us noticed. Her ticket is for next month...

Tomorrow we will spend the day trying to fix this mess!

Trauma prá vida toda / Scars for life...

Fábio e eu apostamos corrida para ver quem chegava primeiro á sala de TV. Eu que não sou de perder apostas, abro a porta gritando:
- GANHEI!!
Na sala de TV, minha filha caçula e um amigo. Bato a porta com força e subo corredno pro meu quarto me trocar - eu estava de calcinha e camiseta.
Fico p da vida. Custava avisar que ela tinha visitas?
Volto vestida. Minha filha rolando de dar risada.
Dou uma bronca nela e já vou avisando que não pago terapia pro menino de jeito nenhum. Ele vai ter que se livrar do trauma de ter visto uma quarentona de calcinha, sozinho.

++++++++++++++++++++++

Fábio and I raced each other to the TV room. I always play to win, so there would be no way I would let him beat me, so when I won, I burst into teh room yelling:

- I WON!

In the TV room, my younger child was entertaining a friend. I slammed the door closed and rushed back up. I was on my underware.
After I changed, I got back to the TV, told my daughter off and explained to the boy there was no way I was paying for his therapy. he better find a way to get out of the trauma himself...

O beduino maluco / Crazy bedouin

Pic from net

Depois do passeio incrível, onde o beduino me levou pra conhecer lugares maravilhosos, eu subi na Monica ( a burrinha, nao a amiga) e começamos o trajeto despinguelo abaixo.Pela primeira vez, senti medo. O beduino, que ate entao tinha sido um cara super gentil e atencioso, parecia outra pessoa. Talvez ele tivesse esperado que eu desse gorgetas para todos os amiguinhos dele que me entupiram de chá, talvez ele tivesse se aborrecido com alguma coisa que eu disse ou fiz, a verdade e que ele estava impaciente e irritado, descendo as escadarias no maior pau.

O primeiro incidente ( sim, primeiro), foi quando estavamos descendo as escadas de pedra e ele ia feito um louco, desconsiderando as pessoas que vinham na direção contrária. Complicado isso, por que de cima do burro, eu nao tinha controle nenhum. E o meu joelho ia tirando finas de pedras, arvores, paredes, e muito pior - de pessoas.
Até que tudo deixou de ser imaginação da minha cabeça fértil e o beduino conduziu o burrinho tão proximo às pessoas que vinham subindo as escadarias, que o meu joelho bateu no peito de um senhor que cambaleou e caiu. Por sorte ele caiu no degrau de cima, e não rolou escada abaixo.
Fiquei lívida. Tive medo.
O beduíno voltou lá, tentou falar com os turistas que acompanhavam o senhor e depois veo reclamando que a culpa tinha sido dele ( do velhinho), por que ele tinha avisado pro senhor nao passar na escada junto com o burrinho, mas ele foi assim mesmo.
Sei não...
Pouco depois ele começou a ficar inquieto outra vez. Eu não estava entendendo nada. Mas dessa vez a coisa foi mais complicada e quem caiu do cavalo do burro  fui eu.
Literalmente. Numa curva mais acentuada a Monica pisou em falso,se desiquilibrou e quem foi pro chão fui eu. Fiquei com o pé enroscado no estribo e tive medo de ser arrastada Petra afora por um beduíno doido e uma burrinha assustada.
Graças a Deus nada disso aconteceu.
O beduíno ficou extremamente desconcertado, e pareceu ate preocupado. Mulheres beduínas vieram falar comigo, me ofereceram água, disseram que o coração delas tinha pulado uma batida.
Imagina o meu onde tinha ido parar.
Decidi ir a pé. pelo menos um pouco, até eu me acalmar, por que eu também sabia que a distancia ainda era longa, o calor estava de rachar e eu nao gosto de andar. Muito menos sozinha em temperaturas escaldantes.
O beduíno desembestou na minha frente. Foi embora.
Pedi para um colega dele chama-lo por que eu queria pagar pelo tour, ele tinha feito mais de 50% e eu tinha ficado feliz com tudo o que eu vi. Achei que se eu pagasse o combinado e não desse gorgeta ( pq ele nao iria acabar o trajeto) seria um acordo justo.
Tentei paga-lo. Ele nem olhou quanto dinheiro eu estava dando para ele. Recusou veementemente.
- Não acabei o seu tour. Eu combinei que ia te levar de volta ate o Treasury.
Eu disse que não ia mais subir no burrinho.
Ele concordou e foi caminhando ao meu lado. Ele parecia mais calmo, mais tranquilo. Andamos mais um tanto e eu achei que dava pra voltar ao burrico.
Não disse que detesto andar?? Pois é!
Fizemos mais uma boa parte do trajeto de volta. Mais paisagens lindas, mais vistas sensacionais...
Aí ele sugeriu que fossemos visitar a nascente dágua. Concordei, achando que era mais um dos pontos turisticos de Petra.
O beduino enveredou por uma vielinha onde nao tinha ninguem. Nem turistas, nem arabes, nem beduinos, nem nada. Fiquei um pouco apreensiva.
Ai ele disse que eu ia poder tirar a roupa e nadar, se eu quisesse. Fiquei nervosa. Me lembrei dele falando que muitas mulheres estrangeiras vao para a Jordania, em um dia se apaixonam por um beduino e se mudam para o acampamento beduino. Minha espinha gelou. O menino nao devia ter muito mais que 20 anos, impossivel ele estar querendo alguma coisa comigo, que podia facilmente ser mae dele.
Enquanto a minha mente tentava processar o que estava acontecendo, o beduino levou o burrinho pra perto de umas pedras e subiu nele. 
SUBIU NO BURRINHO JUNTO COMIGO!
Minha ansiedade e meu medo aumentaram muito. Queria sair correndo e gritando histérica, mas correr pra onde? Correr pra quem?
Pedi pra voltar. Disse que eu nao queria ir ver a nascente dágua, que eu estava cansada e com medo de cair do burro, por que o terreno era muito pedregoso.
O beduino ficou bravo. Comecou a gesticular e gritar que eu disse que iria com ele até a nascente, que na cultura dele era uma ofensa mudar de ideia, que eu nao confiava nele, e quanto mais ele falava, mais bravo ele ia ficando. Mais irritado ele ficava. E maior era o meu medo.
Aí, do nada, como que por ordem divina, apareceu um casal que estava perdido. Eles pararam o beduino pra pedir informacao ( o rapaz pulou do burro rapidinho, como se ele nao pudesse ser visto nele comigo). Aproveitei a distracao dele e pulei do burrico  tambem ( nao sei como eu consegui ser tao agil. ate ali era um sacrificio subir e descer do burrico). 
Dei o dinheiro para ele, ele 'não queria receber, veio com aquela conversinha de que não tinha acabado, mas eu nao me fiz de rogada. Disse que eu estava satisfeita, que pra mim tinha acabado sim, que ele tinha sido otimo, muito obrigada, paguei e xispei.
Pedi pro casal se eu podia continuar a caminhada com eles. O beduino nao podia fazer nada comigo, então comecou a bater no burrinho dele, furioso.
Meu coracao gelou, mas eu nao falei nada. Pobre Monica.
O casal concordou, mas nao me deu muita bola nao. Deve ter achado que eu era local ( euuu?) ou sei lá o que, por que afinal de contas, eles me viram no burrico acompanhada do moleque, né? Devem ter achado que era algum esquema para tirar dinheiro deles, ou sabe-se lá o que!
O beduino ia pra longe e voltava onde eu estava, ia e voltava, ia e voltava. E cada vez que ele chegava perto de mim, ele falava coisas que eu nao entendia. Bravo. Aos gritos.
Eu ja tinha pago pelo passeio, nao sei o que mais ele podia querer. Eu nao respondia nada, continuava com medo.
Pouco depois de nos voltarmos ao caminho turistico, o casal decidiu ir visitar umas ruinas que eu nao queria ver. Na verdade, eu nao queria ver mais nada. queria ir embora, sumir dali.Corri e pedi a compania de um outro casal que estava passando ali por perto. Dois franceses.
Foi a minha salvacao, por que o beduino voltou enlouquecido, berrando e esbravejando. O frances se colocou na minha frente e disse que a conversa acabava ali. O beduino tentou reclamar, bateu boca, xingou um pouco e se contentou em dizer que nao estava falando com o cara, mas comigo. O Frances grandão, nao quis saber. Me defendeu comos e me conhecesse há anos. Nao quis nem saber a minha versão da historia. Disse que se eu nao queria papo, pra ele era o suficiente.
O casal de franceses me escoltou ate o Treasury, quando nós percebemos que um grupo de meninos beduinos estava nos seguindo. Eram uns 10 moleques. Eu achei que era neurose do Frances, mas ele dizia : vamos parar dois segundos aqui. Paravamos, os beduininhos passavam, se sentavam na proxima pedra disponivel e ficavam ali. Nos os passavamos, eles se levantavam e continuavam a nos seguir. Isso aconteceu umas 10 vezes, mas eu já não estava mais com medo.
Só queria ir pro hotel descansar.

Foi assim ate a saida de Petra. Os franceses decidiram me levar ate fora do monumento. os moleques continuaram a nos seguir. Fomos ate a rua do meu hotel. Os meninos atras. O casal decidiu me levar ate a recepcao do hotel, onde eles acharam que eu estava segura, e eu subi pra tomar um banho e descançar, extremamente agradecida pela compania, pela proteção e pelo carinho.

Voces acreditam que o doido do beduino encontrou as minhas amigas, Monica e Renata e foi falar com elas? Foi esbravejar que eu nao fui até a nascente dágua, que ele nao tinha idade pra ser meu filho, que ele JÁ tinha 19 anos...
O molequinho estava enfurecido. E deu o cartão dele para elas me entregarem...

Será que ele achou que eu ia ligar?

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

After a wonderful tour, where the Bedouin took me to see wonderful places, I got on Monica (the donkey, not the friend) and started the path downwards. For the first time during this tour,  I was afraid. The Bedouin, who had been super kind and considerate, seemed like another person. Perhaps he had expected me to give gratuity to all his friends that gave me tea, maybe  something I said or did upset him. I have no idea what happened. All I knew, he  turned into an impatient and angry person, going down down the stairs in a rush, pulling the donkey ( and me).The first incident (yes, first) was when we were going down the  stairs and he was running like a madman, disregarding the people coming in the opposite direction. The problem was I was on the donkey, but I had no control over it. And my knee was bumping into stones, trees, walls, and much worse - people.
I was getting worried. Before I could think it was my imagination, the Bedouin led the donkey so near  the people who were caming up the stairs, my knee hit the chest of an old  man who lost balance and fell. Luckily he landed on the top step, and did not roll down the stone steps.I was livid. I was afraid.The Bedouin approached the man,, tried to talk to the tourists who accompanied the old man, and then came back complaining it was all the old man's fault, as he had warned him to wait for the donkey to go by, but he did not listen.
HmmmShortly after, he began to get restless again. I did not understand what was happening, or what was distressing him. But this time things were more complicated for me. I fell off the horse's back.Literally. On a  steeper curve Monica ( the donkey) stepped sideways, lost balance and off I went to the ground. I got my foot tangled in the stirrup and I was afraid of being pulled by a scared donkey leb by a crazy  Bedouin.Thank God nothing worse happened.The Bedouin was extremely disconcerted, he even seemed worried. Some bedouin women came running up to me, offered me water, said their hearts skipped a beat.Imagine how I felt.I decided to walk, at least for a little while, to calm down, and make a proper decision. I was pissed off, I was angry, but I also knewthere was still a long way to go, it was darn hot and I hate exercising.
The Bedouin rushed in front of me and he was gone.
I asked a colleague of his to call him back, so I could to pay for the tour. I had a very good tour until we started our way back, he had to get paid for his good work. I would pay him what we agreed, but no tip.
 He did not look at the money I was giving him. He vehemently refused.- I have not finished the tour. I promised I would take you back to the Treasury.I told him I was not going to get on the donkey. He agreed and walked besides me. He looked calmer. We walked a bit more and I felt I could get back to the donkey. We covered another good part of the return path. Gorgeous landscapes,  sensational views ...Then he suggested we visited the Spring water. I agreed, thinking it was just another tourist attraction in Petra.The Bedouin then took a narrow path that was totally empty. No tourists nor Arabs, no Bedouins, or anyone. I was a little apprehensive.Then he said I would be able to undress and swim, if I wanted. I was nervous, almost histerical, but I had to think. I remembered him saying that many foreign women go to Jordan, in one day fall in love with a Bedouin man and move to the Bedouin camp. My spine chilled. The boy was not even 20 years old.I could not believe he wanted to "date"me. i could not be possible. I could easily be his mother.
As my mind tried to process what was happening, the Bedouin took the donkey close to some rocks and went on it. WENT ON THE DONKEY. WITH ME! My anxiety and my fear increased greatly. I wanted to go away running and screaming hysterically, but run where? Running for whom?I asked to go back. I said I did not want to see the spring water, I was tired and afraid of falling again, because the terrain was very rocky.The Bedouin became angry. He began to gesticulate and shout, complaining  I said I would go with him to the spring water. That in his  culture  it was an offense to change one's mind. He said  I did not trust him. He was furious. And the more he talked, the angrier he grew. I was terrified.Then, out of the blue, as if by divine interference, a lost couple showed up. They stopped the Bedouin to ask for information (the boy jumped off the donkey as quickly as he could,  as if he could not be seen on it with me). I took advantage of the distraction  and jumped off the donkey too.
I paid him, he 'did not want to receive the money, but this time I was not open for negotiation. There would be no more talking.
I asked the couple if I could walk with them. The Bedouin could not do anything, about it, he could not stop me, so he started beating up the poor donkey, furious.My heart sank, but I did not say anything.The couple agreed to let me tag along, but they did not seem very interested in me. There was no chit chat, no conversation. they were probably afraid I was part of some sort of scam.
The Bedouin went away and came back where I was several times. And each time he came near me, he said things that I did not understand. Angry. Screaming.I had already paid for the ride and the tour, I do not know what else he could want. I simply did not engage. I was afraid.Shortly after we reached the tourist path, the couple decided to visit some ruins I did not want to see. Actually, I did not want to see anything else. All I wanted to do was leave, disappear.I saw another couple and asked them the same favor. Could I please tag along? They were French.
It was my salvation, because the Bedouin lost it, he came my way, screaming and yelling. The Frenchman stood in front of me and said that the conversation was over. The Bedouin protested, but he was powerless to do anything but try to intimidate me. My French saviour could not care less, he simply defended me and protected me all the way to the Treasury.He did not even know my version of the history, he said if I did not want to talk to the guy, that was enough to him. The French couple escorted me up to the Treasury, then we realized  a group of Bedouin boys were following us. They were about 4 kids. The French guy would say: let's stop two seconds here. We stopped the beduins  passed by us, sat on the next available rock and stayed there. We'd pass by them, they would get up and continue to follow us. This happened over and over again, but by then I was no longer afraid.Because the boys did not seem to give up,  the French couple decided to take me up  all the way to the gate. The kids continued following us. The couple decided to take me  all the way up to the reception of my hotel where they thought I was safe.
I went to my bedroom tired, but extremely grateful for the company, the protection and affection.Do you believe the crazy Bedouin found my friends, and Renata and Monica and went talking to them? He complained I did not go with him to the Spring water,Rant, he said he was not old enough to be my son, that he was ALREADY 19 years old ... he was angry, And trying to advocate his case to my girlfriends.In the end, he gave his card to them and asked them to give it to me. Did he really expected me to call?

Hoje eu acordei com a corda toda e com tudo planejadissimo.
Pulei da cama as 6:40, fiz cafe pras meninas, preparei as caixinhas pra levar pro correio ( seu presentinho ta indo, Tatiiii), e preparei a minha listinha de coisas pra fazer antes de embarcar pro Sri Lanka amanha:
- ir ao correio
- entregar uns documentos a um cliente
- comprar ultimas coisinhas pra viagem
- manicure/depilacao
- pagar viagem das meninas ( na escola)
- arrumar malas
- confirmar taxi pra nos levar ao aeroporto amanha
- confirmar motorista do aeroporto ao resort no Sri Lanka
.
.
.
e a lista continuava!
As 8 da manha toca o telefone. Era da escola das meninas. Lia esta com dor no pe.


- A sua filha esta com dor no pe, vem buscar
- Ela nao pode perder aula. Voce ja deu anti inflamatorio?
- A Lia, sua filha, esta com dor no pe.
- Ela nao pode perder aula. Voce ja deu anti inflamatorio?

E a conversa ficou engastalhada assim por mais de 5 minutos. Desisti da enfermeira da escola, liguei para a professora da Lia, que fez a gentileza de ir la, falar com a Lili e  me mandar o veredito:

- Vem buscar. Nao parece balela.

Peguei. Levei pro hospital. Acabei a via sacra as 2 da tarde, exausta, com uma filha com o pe quebrado, a lista de coisas a fazer completamente ignorada e uma viagem pra PRAIA amanha.
Comentei que vou prum resort com uma filha com o pe quebrado?

ai, ai

*******************************************

Today I woke up full of energy and ready to get lots of important things done!

I jumped out of bed at 6:40, prepared my girl's breakfast, made up the boxes to take you to the post office( Tatiiii your gift is coming!), and prepared my to do list. We are going to Sri Lanka tomorrow, remember?
Here is the list:

- Go to the post office
- Deliver some documents to a client
- Buy last minute things for our trip
- Manicure / Waxing
- Pay Anita's school trip to Oman
- Pack bags
- Confirm taxi to take us to the airport tomorrow
- Confirm the driver from the airport to the resort in Sri Lanka
.
.
.
and the list went on and on, and on!
8 in the morning the phone rings. It was the girls' school. It seems like Lia is not feeling well. 
- Your daughter has a sore foot. Come and pick her up. 
- She can not miss class. Have you given her some anti-inflammatory?
- Lia, your daughter has a sore foot. Come and pick her up
- She can not miss class. Have you given her some anti-inflammatory?
The conversation went like this for more than 5 minutes. I gave up on  the school nurse substitute, who clearly had no clue what she was doing.
I then called Lia's teacher, who was kind enough to go check on her and deliver me the verdict:
- Come and get her. It does not seem she is bullshitting.
I drove to the school, picked her up, drove her to the hospital, where we stayed until 2 pm
I got home exhausted, hungry, with a daughter with a broken foot, my to do list completely ignored and a trip overseas tomorrow.

Did I mention we are going to a resort in Sri Lanka? and did I mention Lia broke her foot? Beach, swimming pools and a broken bone just does not seem right.

jantarzinho / dinner party

Meu marido tava louco pra convidar uma colega de trabalho e o marido dela pra jantar aqui em casa.
Como ele esta de ferias, achou que seria uma ideia maravilhosa marcar pra quarta feira. Nao, eu nao estou em ferias, mas e dai, ne?
Pra dar tudo mais ou menos certo, fui a um distribuidor de importados e comprei um lombao de porco com antecedencia.
No comeco da semana minha empregada se declarou doente e incapacitada a trabalhar pelo resto da semana e sumiu. ( como e que ela sabia que nao ia sarar ate o fim da semana?)
Na manha da quarta a casa estava de pernas pro ar, a cozinha parecia um campo de guerra e a gente ja nao sabia mais onde estavam as roupas limpas, a escova de dentes e a comida do cachorro.
Uma zona total.
Ligo pra confirmar o jantar e o cara me pergunta:
- 6 horas? 6:30?
quase infarto. Eu to trabalhando. Nao tem a menor chance de eu conseguir ter alguma coisa pronta pra por na mesa as 6:30 da TARDE.
- Ta maluco David, nos somos brasileiros. Vem as 8.
temperei o lombo e as 2 da tarde liguei pro Fabio botar o bicho no forno ( ele esta em ferias, lembra?)
As 7:50 estavamos com tudo pronto.
8 horas
8:15
8:30
8:45
- Vamos mandar um torpedinho? Vai ver eles se perderam...
9:00
9:30 eles finalmente chegaram. Eu ja tinha ido tirar um cochilo na sala de TV, as criancas estavam de pijama, prontas pra dormir - se nao fosse a fome enlouquecedora, que as manteve acordadas.


Botei o lombo que assou por SETE horas de volta no forno pra dar uma tostadinha. Acendi a parte de cima do forno.


Queimei o lombo
Esqueci o creme de papaia no freezer ( coloquei la so pra dar uma esfriadinha)
Quebrei um prato


Resumindo - o dito jantar foi um desastre! E isso o que acontece quando voce convida amigos pra jantar no meio da semana.


PS eu comentei que a cozinha esta agora interditada por que a empregada ainda nao apareceu e nos oficialmente usamos os ultimos pratos e talheres??

********************************************************

My husband really wanted to invite a coworker and her husband to come for dinner at our place.

As he is on holiday, he thought it would be a wonderful idea to schedule it for Wednesday. No, I'm not on holiday, but who cares, right?
Trying to be as prepared as possible, I went to an imported meat distributor  and bought a pork loin several days in advance. 
On Friday, my maid declared herself sick and unable to work the whole coming week. She simply packed and disappeared. (And how she knew that her cold woyuld last a whole week, I have no idea).
On the Wednesday morning the house was upside down, the kitchen looked like a battlefield and we no longer knew where were our clean clothes,  toothbrush or dog food.
A total disaster.
During the day, I call to confirm the dinner and the guy asks me:
- 6 pm? 6:30?
I freaked out big time. I'm working. There is NO chance I could have something ready on the table by  6:30 in the AFTERNOON.
- David, don't be crazy, you are coming to have dinner with Brazilians. Come at 8pm.
I seasoned the pork loin and 2 pm phoned Fabio to put the meat in the oven (he is on holiday, remember?)
 7:50 pm we were all set. Dinner ready, table looking pretty - all good to go!
8 pm
8:15
8:30
8:45
- Let's send a text? Maybe they got lost ...
9:00
9:30 they finally arrived. I was already taking a nap in the TV room, the children were in pajamas, ready to sleep - and they would have, if it wasn't for the terrible hunger  that kept them awake.
The pork was in the oven for SEVEN hours, but when they arrived I decided to put back just to warm it up. The meat was so tender, so deliciously moist, i could not wait to eat it. I turned on the top burners of the oven.
I burned the pork. And I felt sad. 
Then I forgot the papaya cream in the freezer (I put it there only to cool it down a bit - 3 minutes, 5 minutes maybe)
I broke a plate
In short - the dinner was a disaster! 
That's what happens when you invite friends for dinner in the middle of a working week.

PS Did  I mentioned the kitchen is now officially off limits? the maid is still not back and all our china, cutellery and glasses are dirty, waiting for a miracle to happen.
I still have faith...

Getting my documents sorted

I left Brazil  12 years ago and just now I found out  my "legal"situation  is not as good as I thought.

An imaginary conversation would go like this ( and in Brazil everyone thinks they have the right to ask for your IRD card, your voter card. I mean EVERYONE - shops, convenience stores even your manicure may ask for it).

Voter registration?

Cancelled.

IRD  card?

Cancelled.

Driver's License?

Expired in 2006

ID card?

Yep - I have that! But the photo was taken when I was 17. Is it still valid?

Fabio, who is a decent guy, decided to help me fix my situation,  and off we went knocking doors in public stablishments. I don't have to say it was a nightmare.

 To get a new IRD card, one needs voter's card. And in Brazil it is COMPULSORY to vote. Mine had been canceled because I lost 20 electoral turns (of course I transferred my title to  NZ, but the Brazilian  embassy in New Zealand lost my request and have no records of the request ...

They canceled my title, I had to request another one, sign some paers, pay some fees.

Luckily the place was empty, the attendant wanted to go home earlier and did not create too many problems. I did not mention I live overseas, I apologised for not voting, I just pretended to be a lunatic, who "forgot"to vote for 13 consecutive years.

To get the IRD card, I had to go to the Federal building 3 times and no one even talked to me about my problem.

- We run out of numbered tickets.

- But it is 10 am and you close at 9 pm. There is no one in the waiting room...

- Yeah, no more tickets. Besides, you have to go online and see what the problem is. Then you come here.

I go home, access the Internet, who send me to the Federal building ...

I go back the next day - same darn story. No more tickets, you have to look on the internet before coming here. I explain that the internet does not tell me anything, the girl apologizes, says she can not do anything.

As far as I was concerned, I was done. I could not care less if I had an ID card or not. I never needed it in the last 12 years, why would I suddenly need it now? But Fabio, that decent guy I married, was on a mission. He wanted to get it sorted once and for all. I kicked, screamed and cried, but I went.

In our third try, we managed to get a numbered ticket, giving us a place in queue to see a "specialist".

Elmer meets me:

- Your IRD card is canceled.

- I know.

You have to check what the problem is, you can do it online, than you pay a fee or whatever you owe  in taxes ... the payment can be done at the bank. 

- I can not access anything on the Internet, today is my last day here, I have no time to go to the bank. 

- Wait. I'll see what the problem is. There is only one situation in which I can solve everything here. Let me see here ... uhmmmm ... your CIC is linked to a company that used it's number, and the company is irregular, so it is blocking it.

- I had a business, in my past life

- Did you close it?

- Nope 

I can only help if  your company has been closed by the government ...

... I hope ...

Ooops! It's your lucky day. The company has been closed by the government. But I can only help you if it was closed for a specific reason. Among all the reasons, the system will only allow me to solve it for you if it is for one reason.

... I hope ...

- Look there! It was closed for abandonment. You do not owe taxes.

- Well,  I know that.

- And your declarations are also in order

- Yep

- You did everything right. And got lucky. I will reactivate your IRD card.

The guy printed a statement saying I have no debts, and I left the place with a brand new IRD card.

The officer who assisted me was incredibly competent and helpful. My biggest problem was to cross the door to his office.

oter's and IRD cards in order, I went tothe Traffic Department renew my license. The easiest process, right?

First I went to a broker who booked a time for me. Then I stood in a huge line, until it was my turn:

- I can not renew it for you. Your license is full traffic points.

- It can not be. I moved overseas 12 years ago. At that time there were no points.

- Look, they are all here ... many, many. Your license is not only expired, it is blocked.

The guy sends me to another queue, where someone could check "my"points.

I explained the situation.

- Do you have a car in your name?

- No.

- You do not have a car with the number plate XXXX?

- No. But wait - tell me what brand is this car.

- Corsa.

- A black corsa. I sold it in 2006. (This car had no A / C and I was carrying Anita, so I sold the corsa and bought a Palio with air conditioning. I only left Brazil in 2009 - 3 years latter)

- It is still in your name

- ?????

- And now?

You have to find the guy and transfer it ...

It is a lot easier said than done huh?

I almost killed myself trying to remember what did I do with this car, then fabioI remembered the transaction was made so I could buy the Palio. I signed the papers at the car dealer, who would transfer the car to the new buyer.

I left in tears. No one seems able to help me. I found out the car is still registered to my name, there are lots of  car registrations due to be done and dozens of fines. All under my name.

I called a lawyer.

He asked for the sales receipt? Of course I  don't have it ... This sale was completed 15 years ago ...

I have an ID, IRD and voter's card.I also have a car, a debt of fines and automobile taxes. And I have no idea how to get out of this pickle.

Murphy also goes after my clients

I work with relocation and help my clients settle into the country.

My job is to make sure they have all they need to start a happy life in bahrain.

This couple had lots of questions, lots of doubts about what to do here, where to take their son. We visited clubs, went to several places and when we least expected puff, my tyre went flat!

46 C outside, and of course we were nowhere near a shade.

I have never changed a tyre in my life.

The client, a gentleman, offered to do it for me. Of course I have manners and said no. I told him to go to the coffee shop across the road and stay there - no negotiation.

Thank God he did not listen to me. He went under the car, checked everything, read the manual and changed the tyre for me.

I have never felt so many emotions all at once. I was delighted, embarassed and grateful. All with the same intensity!

wanna save some money?

This is an old story. It happened to me once I moved to Dubai in 2004.




You know when you think you've found a pot of gold?
One of those great deals it is hard to believe they are for real?
Well, today I found one of those!
Tomorrow is my birthday and I've been planning to get a manicure for days.
Luckily today I just passed in front of a beauty salon called White Snow. The name struck me as funny but I did not think about it twice.
When I found out about the price, I was mesmerized. 60 dirhams.
I usually paid 70. Saving money is not a bad idea.
But before I left the place, the girl gave me a pamphlet with the promotions of the month.

One of the packages offered a hot oil treatment,  Indian henna for the hair, manicure, pedicure, wax for the legsl, armpit, mustache and eyebrows. It also included a facial, haircut and bleaching the arm's hair for only 100 dirhams.
I could hardly believe it!
For the first time "promotion" really meant promotional prices...
I had no doubt. I took the pamphlet and went home happy and as larry, thinking about all the money I would save.
After lunch I called the salon for an appointment and the girl who answered the phone did not understand anything I said.
- Sorry, small English. Come 4 pm.
White Snow, problems with language ...
I should have second guessed, but I did not.The price was so good and I was so excited to find such a great deal, I did nto notice anything fishy. At the very least, I was saving a minimum of 200 dirhams.
Man, was I happy...
I decided I could cancel the haircut and the bleaching of my arms. I do not have much hair, and would not like to go around with blond hair on them anyway. And my hairdresser was worth every penny he charegd..
At 4 pm sharp, I got there. The lady ( who does not speak English) made me wait for 20 minutes, without acknowledging me. Then she came around and asked me to wait for another 15 minutes.
Great. For the price, the wait was nothing.
Once again, I failed to notice the signals...
Not only the receptionist did not speak English, but the beautician, manicure, pedicure, hairdresser, masseur also could not speak. They were all the same person. I was in a "one woman salon".
When she was finally ready, she came over.

First step: she plastered my hair with the most unpleasant smelling oil. Before I let her do anything else,  I asked her in English, mime and sign language if any of those products would change the color of my hair.
- NO MADAM!
I was still very happy for the savings, and feeling very proud of myself for being so smart. I think I'll come back here every week.
I love the United Arab Emirates!

After we finished the hair ritual, we moved on to doing my pedicure.
The girl put my feet in one of those foot spas and went to tend to another client (???????). I did  not like it much, but thought she had everything under control.
Maybe that's how she managed to charge so little for her services. Production line.
Genius. The woman is a genius! And so am I. I found her and managed to save lots of money AND get pampered.
After half an hour left with my feet in the foot spa thing, my conviction was beginning to weaken.

The manicure and pedicure were finished almost with no incident. The only hic up was a crooked nail which she insisted on filing the wrong side, making it worse. A nail shorter than the other nine and in a different shape is not the end of the world. I am very picky,I must admit!
By the end of the process, she said something which I understood to be:
- After the massage I paint your nails!
Sure! Obvious. I thought it made sense, so it will not damage the nail polish.
She then tried to stick mywet  feet into my new shoes. She also found it completely strange when I took my slippers out of  my bag.

Next step: facial treatment!

The beautician put something on my face that felt and smelled like cheap soap.
When  I could take a peek I saw that it WAS actually cheap soap.
She spent lots of time working on my face. It was hard to breathe with all the products she was plastering all over my face. And between one product and another, she would just put ice on my skin. God, that was uncomfortable...
Around this time, she remembered the other client and left me there for another 30 minutes, with steam on my face.

When she came back, she started using something that looked and felt like a fork in my nose and cheeks. It was a nightmare to convince the girl that I did not want that. Not even after all the hindy speech she delivered in favor of the fork thing.

NO!!

Another half hour with a mask on my face and cucumber on my eyes and the facial treatment was over.
By then it was clear to me i would not let her touch my eyebrows.The wax was so hot she burnt my legs, so I also cancelled the armpit waxing.
She used thread to pluck the hair from my mustache. That was painful but effective. With a red face I moved to the hairdresser chair, to take all those stinky products from my hair.
Or should I say my ORANGE hair?
I used all my strenght to keep calm and not kill the woman who made my hair look like a pumpkin.

It seemed to me she was done. She openned the door and smiled, expecting me to pay and leave. When I reminded her about the nail polish, she looked very confused. I went back to miming, pointing, using sign language. When she finally understood, she went inside and came back with TWO nail polish bottles. I could even chose one of the colors. How lucky can one be?
As she was in a hurry, she painted my nails (without taking the cuticles out) standing up. She also decided to apply a double coat in one of the nails, but not the other 9. After another 10 minutes, she realised I would not leave if she did not make all my nails look the same.
Right in front of the place, I damaged one of the nails, but by then I was so exhausted I decided to just let go. It would not be worth going back to try and fix it...