Fui clonada! I have been cloned!

Abri o facebook e tinha um pedido de amizade. Corri lá prá ver de quem era e quase infartei:
Inaiê Ramalho quer ser sua amiga.
Como assim, Inaie Ramalho? Inaie Ramalho sou eu!!
Cliquei no nome. E lá estava eu ela. 
Pensei em ignorar o pedido. Fiquei meio desnorteada, não estou acostumada a encontrar muitas Inaies por ai, imagine uma INAIE RAMALHO.
Além do nome não ser dos mais comuns, a menina só tem um sobrenome, como eu. Cadê a mãe desnaturada dessa criança que não lhe deu sobrenome materno?
 O negócio é que a Inaie Ramalho, a outra, existe mesmo. Moreninha, linda, 12 anos. Não tive coragem de recusar o pedido de amizade, e hoje em dia, converso comigo mesma, com ela, quase todos os dias.
A menininha é porreta...

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I opened my facebook only yo find a friend request waiting for me. nothing anormal about that, but when I opened the request, I almost had a heart attack!
Inaie Ramalho was inviting me to be her friend... but I am Inaie Ramalho. 
When I searched the site, to my horror, I confirmed my worst fear : she was for real.
Not knowing what to do, I accepted her friend invitation.
My name is very unusual. Most people in Brazil have two surnames, I only have one. And now I have her, with an unusual name and only one surname too. My name. My surname.
But she won me over, almost straight away. The girl is lovely. 12 years old, she calls me for a chat most days. And every time she does, I accept the challenge and chat with myself her.

valores morais/ Moral values

Minha filha mais nova não gosta de jóias, mas na minha família há uma tradiçao de dar jóia pra filha no aniversário de 15 anos.
Eu ganhei, a irmã dela ganhou. Eu tenho a minha e guardo com muito carinho e muito orgulho.
Hoje, resolvi mais uma vez tentar convence-la que é uma boa idéia aceitar a jóia no aniversário do ano que vem.
Falei da tradição, falei que hoje ela podia não se importar, mas que um dia ela daria valor, falei pra ela guardar pros filhos...
Aí tentei mostrar que eu tinha razão e lasquei:

- Lia, a única coisa que fica na vida é jóia.

Ela arregalou os olhos assustada, e depois caiu na gargalhada. postou no BBM e no facebook, que a mãe disse que na vida, a única coisa que fica é jóia.

Olha a minha reputação arruinada para sempre. O que eu quis dizer é que... Ah!! Deixa prá lá, vai.
Ano que vem ela vai ganhar a jóia e pronto. Sem discussão.*******************************

My 14 year old child does no like jewellery, but in our family, girls get a piece of jewellery on their 15th b'day, so i started my campaing.
I got mine, your sis got hers. I am 40 and I treasure my 15th b'day gift to this day.
I spoke about our tradition, suggested she may not like it now, but when she gets older she may have good memories, told her to keep it to her own kid... when I run out of arguments, I just said:

- Lia, jewellery is the only thing that last in life.

She look at me horrified, then she realized it came out wrong, what I really meant was...oh, never mind what I emant. She quickly posted it on facebook and on BBM.
Next year, she will get a nice piece of jewellery. and that is the end of it.

Presente!!!

Olha o quadro que eu ganhei da minha amiga Renata!!!!! E ele tem 80 cm X 80 cm. Só vai dar eu na parede da casa!!!!

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Look what I got from my friend Renata!!! It is 80 cm X 80 cm. Gorgeous!

a vida começa aos 40/ life starts at 40!

Se vocês me acompanham há algum tempo, sabem que eu geralmente viajo nas ferias de verão. Bahrain vira uma fornalha e eu nao gosto de ser cozida viva, então eu me pirulito daqui.
Esse ano resolvi radicalizar! Nos ultimos 3 anos viajamos duas vezes para os Estados Unidos, eu dei um pulinho no Brasil ano passado ( visitei a Amazonia) e também sassaricamos um pouco pela Europa. Conheci lugares lindos, revisitei cidades encantadoras, mas essas férias vão ser um pouco diferentes. Não, vão ser completamente diferentes!!
Vou prá Ásia.
Conheço a Tailandia, a Malásia, Hong Kong e Cingapura. Amo.
A radicalizada não é no destino.
É que eu vou sozinha!!
Em 40 anos, essa vai ser a primeira vez na minha vida que eu viajo sozinha. Sempre tive comigo mãe, amigas, marido ( 99%) das vezes. Mas dessa vez, o planbo é outro.
A Yolhi, minha amiga mexicana vai além. Ela diz que eu não vou nem a padaria, nem a manicure sozinha.
Quando ela me ligava e eu não estava em casa, ela nunca perguntava "onde vc está?" - ela sempre perguntava: 'Com quem você está?"
E é verdade. Eu sou das massas, não vejo graça nenhuma em fazer coisas sozinha, então essa viagem vai ser um grande passo prá mim. Vejo essa viagem como um divisor de águas.
Vou ter tempo pra me conhecer melhor, para tomar decisões que impactam somente em mim. Vou ter que decidir, dia após dia, o que fazer, como fazer e por que fazer.
Vai ser triste não poder dividir meu passeio com alguém ( mas é prá isso que vocês estão aí), prá visitar esse lugares comigo!
Minhas terapeutas ( tenho TRÊS!!)  dizem que vai ser ótimo prá mim. Eu estou animada, e estou com um medo do kct. Mas eu vou. Já decidi.
Devo sair daqui na primeira semana de julho, com destino ao Vietnam. Visito uma amiga em Ha Noi ( prá não ficar tão assustador logo de cara) e depois viajo sozinha pelo país e atravesso a fronteira para visitar Laos, Cambodia e Burma. De mochila nas costas. Pretendo viajar entre 5 e 6 semanas.
Se vc tiver alguma dica, pelamor, vai me dando já!!
E eu prometo levar o laptop e ir contando as minhas aventuras ...

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If you follow this blog, you probably noticed I leave Bahrain in summer.This place becomes a furnace and I do not feel like been cooked alive, so I just leave.
This year I decided to radicalize! Our travel destinations in the last three years have been very traditional. USA, Europe, a lil visit to Brazil.
 I visited beautiful places, revisited charming towns, but this time my plans are a little different. I will go to Asia. That in itself is not excentric or different, I've been to Thailand, Malaysia, Hong Kong and Singapore. I loved it. 
But this hols I am traveling A L O N E !
 In 40 years this is going to be the first time in my life that I travel alone. Yolhi, my Mexican friend goes further on her afirmations. She says I do not even go to the bakery, or a manicure alone. When she calls me and I am not home, she never asks "where are you?" - She always asks: 'Who are you with? " And sure enough i will say a name.
I see no fun in doing things alone, then this trip will be a big step for me. My therapists (I have THREE!) Say it will be great for me. I'm excited, and scared.
 But I will do it anyway.
 I am planning to leave here in the first week of July. My first stop will be Vietnam. I will visit a friend in Ha Noi (to ease me off) and then travel the country alone and cross the border to visit Laos, Cambodia and Burma. Backpacking.
If you have any tips, please,  send them over! And I promise to take the laptop and tell my adventures ...

Doncovim / My childhood

Inspirada pelas narrativas do Ernani e da Bel, resolvi entrar na danca e contar a minha trajetoria de vida.
Lendo as historias desses dois amigos queridos, me lembrei de coisas e acontecimentos que ha muito haviam sumido da minha memoria. E foi terapeutico.
Vou dividir com voces a minha historia ( se achar chato, pode pular...a terapia afinal e minha)

Sou filha unica. Nasci em Aguas de Lindoia quando a minha mae tinha apenas 18 anos. Meu pai tinha 20 anos e eu acho que nenhum dos dois sabia muito bem o que era esse negocio de brincar de casinha. Muito menos de boneca.
Diz a minha mae que meu pai chegava para almocar e ela estava brincando comigo ( ainda bebe) e nao tinha nem pensado em fazer o almoco.
Cresci comendo bobagens a qualquer hora do dia ou da noite. Acho que ela nunca aprendeu que a casa deveria ter cafe da manha, almoco e jantar.
Cansei de ver a minha mae tomando coca cola e comendo bifes de manha.
E pra mim, era uma farra. Chocolate, iogurte e danoninho eram permitidos a qualquer momento. Segundo a minha mae, a geladeira tambem era minha - nao tinha cabimento eu ter que pedir permissao para comer na minha propria casa.
Meu pai desde sempre, trabalhou feito um doido para sustentar a familia que ele criou assim que saiu  da adolescencia.
Tenho flashs da minha infancia, mas poucas lembrancas solidas.
Me lembro de passar muito tempo na casa da minha avo, em Serra Negra. A imagem e sempre a mesma. Eu, sentadinha na sala, brincando sozinha com pedras de aquario. Ou deitada no sofa assistindo Jerry Lewis na sessao da tarde. Nao me lembro de passeios, saidas, amiguinhos.Pra minha avo, ninguem era bom o suficiente pra ser meu amigo.
Quando iamos a casa da minha Tia Maria ( 1 vez por mes, talvez) , a coisa mudava - e eu brincava com o meu primo que e 4 anos mais velho que eu.
Brincavamos de indio ( e ele passava terra vermelha em mim, pq a indiazinha era eu), brincavamos de carrinho ( e ele me arrastava num pano pela casa afora, ate ele se cansar, dar um solavanco no carrinho e me derrubar de costas, inevitavelmente batendo a cabeca no chao - sempre a mesma brincadeira, sempre o mesmo final). Me lembro de irmos pra pracinha pegar sementinhas no chao.
Esse meu primo, o Pedro, sempre foi meu idolo. Ele era lindo, sabia tudo. E era bem mais velho, ele ja tinha 8 anos.
me lembro de inventar amigos imaginarios, jogar jogos de tabuleiro como se eu fosse duas pessoas diferentes, brincar de gangorra sozinha - eu corria de um lado pro outro da gangorra ( sim, em pe, em cima da gangorra), pra faze-la subir e descer...
Tambem passei muito tempo na casa da minha madrinha em Sao Paulo. Eu era a unica crianca na casa, ficava horas na frente da televisao. Na adolescencia continuei passando as minhas ferias la, mas troquei a televisao pelo telefone - o sofa era o mesmo. Ficava hoooras deitada nele, conversando com qualquer um disposto a jogar conversa fora.
Alem dessas, minhas lembrancas sao poucas. Nao me lembro de muitos amigos, nem de muitas aventuras. Nao tenho lembrancas tristes - nem me lembro de me sentir sozinha. Eu tinha a impressao de ser a dona do mundo. Os adultos da minha vida sempre me fizeram sentir especial, me fizeram acreditar que eu poderia fazer o que eu bem entendesse da vida, por que eu era uma pessoa capaz.


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Reading posts of two good bloggers ( sorry, they only write in portuguese), I had flasbacks of my own life and found it therapeutic.
I'll share with you my life story (if you find annoying, just ignore it ... this is my self therapy)I am an only child. I was born in Aguas de Lindoia ( Brazil)when my mother was only 18. My father was 20 and I think neither of them knew very well what they were doing. They were playing with a lil doll. 
My mother tells me my father would come home for lunch and she would be playing with me ( I was still a baby), and there would be no lunch for him.
I grew up eating whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted it. I guess she never learned a normal house should have breakfast, lunch and dinner.She would drink coke and eat steak for breakfast. I saw it far too many times.As gastronomy went, I had a free ride. Chocolate, yogurt, sweets  were always available. I remember taking packages of chocolate biscuits to school - and I did that throughout my education years, until i graduated from University.
According to my mother, the house was mine too - and it would be unthinkeable to have to ask permission to eat in my own house.My father has always worked like a madman to support the family he formed straight after his teen years. He would have two jobs, to make sure I would have enough.I have flashbacks of my childhood, but few solid memories.I remember spending much time at my grandmother's house. The memory is always the same. I was sitting in the livingroom, playing alone with aquarium stones. Or lying on the sofa watching Jerry Lewis on TV. I do not remember trips, outings, having friends around. For my grandma, no one was good enough to play with me.Once in a while, my grandma tooke me to visit my Great Aunty Mary - she had a son who was only 4 years older than me, and we were great buddies when we met.
We prettended I was a native Indian (and he would paint me with red dirt), we pretended I was driving a car  (while he dragged me  all over the house, sitting on a cloth, until he  got tired, pulled the cloth and made me fall backwards, hitting my head on the floor. It was always the same game, always the same ending) We went out and collected seeds from the trees.
Pedro was my hero. He knew everything there was to know. And he was much older, he was already  eight.I remember making up imaginary friends, playing board games  alone (like I'm two different people), playing seesaw alone - I ran from side to side of the seesaw (yes, Standing on top of it), to make it go up and down ...I also spent much time in my godmother's house in Sao Paulo. I was the only child in the house and spent hours in front of the television. In my teens I kept going there on my hols, but I switched the television for the phone - the sofa was the same. I spent hours lying there, talking to anyone willing to make small talk with me.Besides these, my memories are few. I know it sounds sad, but I never felt sad. i did not even realized i was lonely. I somehow felt special. The adults in my life made me feel really special and capable of doing anything I wanted.

TIGER BALM

Every time I am anywhere where tiger balm is sold, i am automatically the shopper's target. they go out of their way to convince me ti buy some.

I confess it upsets me because I know ( ???) these creams are for sexual use. I am not sure what it does, but I can imagine. What bothers me is the thought that everyone selling this thing either believes I am a sexaholic who needs help, or a frustrated, frigid woman who has no idea what an orgasm is.

I get fed up - but i am not brave enough to trow a tantrun, so I sulk.

My misery got to an end ( or got much worse) when Alice and some friends came for dinner and she told me, out of the blue, I should use it. She even offered to give me one - as she had several at her place.


Alice, Alice, who would think that, uh?

It took me all my strenght to finally complain about this situation:

- Alice, so tell me once and for all : do I look like a sex addict or a orgasmless woman?

Everybody looked at me with blank faces, but I was delighted I was finally standing up for myself.

After minutes of confused looks, someone was brave enough to ask what the fuck what I meant.

Well, I know this cream is to enhance sexual performance and EVERYONE keeps telling me I should use it. So i wonder what makes me such an easy target.

My friends broke into a compulsive laughter, and I was sure they were laughing because they agreed with the tiger balm sales professionals - there was something seriously worng with me, and it was hilarious I had no idea what it was.

After a long time, someone recovered their breath and managed to say:

- Inaie, tiger balm is for muscular pain...

SHIT! All those guys thought i had artrithis!!

WHAT NOW?

If you live inthe first world and is not rich, please do not read this post, or if you do, try to imagine a different reality, in a place where labour is cheap and life is unimaginable without domestic help. Please don't judge me. Or do, but don't tell me.

Just remember I am a Brazilian girl, living in the Middle East. This is part of my reality.

If you understand the ultimate need of a house maid, please read, and HELP!

I had a gorgeous, efficient, brilliant part time Phillipino maid who was just perfect for me, but my hubby felt we needed a full time person, to clean after our mess day in day out. God, are we capable of messing the house or what?

After a long time looking for this person, I finally found someone to move in. She is only 23, very smilie and has great intentions. She comes from Ethiopia. The problem is her ability to perform tasks without screwing up, and my inability to train her or to deliver helpful, constructive feedback.

I will share my problems with you and hope you can give me some insight!

Creativity -  she hides everytinh she touches, and then she does not have a clue what I am looking for, because her English is very limited!

Initiative - She does whatever she feels like, feels ultra proud of it and I do not have the heart to tell her no one asked for it because we DID NOT WANT IT!

Organization - All clothes end up in someone else's wardrobe. I have instructed her to wash Anita's clothes one day, Lia's on the next, so she would not mix them up. She still does - and even mixes mine and Fabio with the girl's. It is almost impossible to figure out where our clothes are...No, she does not like asking questions.

toc, toc, toc - she wears the most annoying shoes, and makes this noise all day long.

more initiative - I told her not to wash my clothes, or Fabio's. But she does, and she mixes all colours and fabrics together - guess what? We have damaged clothes every week.

Responsibility - she left the gate open and my dog run away. The dog is very small and not road smart - we were lucky she was not killed by a car and the neighbor brought her safely home.
 Another time I explained to her she had to stay in the house every night when I was in London, so the dog would not be alone ( and would have fresh water and food every day). Nothing different from what she does when we are in the house, but she though I would not find out and simply locked the dog in and left for over 48 hours...

Aesthetics - my sculptures are always backwards, sideways or on the wrong place.

Honesty - nothing ever disappeared, but my creams seem to be very watery lately...

Cooking - she can not cook western food ( so I cook my own), but she cooks ethiopian food for herself, and the house stinks.
HEEELP!!!!