Losses, losses, more losses

This year was very tough for me.
First I lost Simon. He was a guy like no other. ALways keen to see people's good side, alwyas ready to help. And so he did.

He was the first person to believe in me. Simon gave me my first job in New Zealand. And kept up with my moods and my immaturity. Simon saw someone I rarely see when I look at the mirror.

He was my friend, my confident. He slept my hand when I needed it, but always wiith love. And man, did I love him...

When his son told me he had just died, I was in orlando with FAbio's family. 9 Rochas and me. All I could do was hide and cry. I would not be able to fly to Auckland to be with his family, and would not be fair to ruin FAbio's family holidays.

DAys later I received another message: Beth had also died.
She was an amazing influence in my life. She met me when I was 14 and helped me see what really mattered in life. Beth was crazy. And fun. And a free spirit.

She was a communist when the dictatorship was full on in Brazil and in the name of freedom she was tortured and separated from her love. She never became bitter. She never complained.

On her journey, she met FAbiana, and raised her as her own daughter. She helped Faby grow wings and tought her how to fly. What an amazing woman FAbiana turned out to be...

And now, just recently, dies Ian, my wonderful friend who lived next door to us in Dubai. He adopted my family, he embraced my friends, he took care of me. And most of all, he loved us for what we are.

SAme as Simon, he just woke up one morning, stood up and dropped dead right next to his bed.

I am not sure how to cope with so many losses. To loose one of them would be unbearable enough, but ALL?

I keep crying, swearinga nd complaining. And hoping they found a good place in heaven or wherever they are now. I know they deserve it.