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I have been thinking a lot about the people who crossed my path throughout my life. One thing that never ceases to amaze me is how generous people are and how much they are willing to help others.
I've been on the "receiving" end of a lot of generosity, people showing how caring and detached they can be when you need them.
And I confess that I am not the most generous person in the world. I am not the girl who will wake up at 5 am to help her neighbor in need and can still carry on with her day as if not had happened.
I am an available person, don't get me wrong. But I'm the shoulder to cry on, the person to whom you turn to talk, but not the one who will help you carry the fridge to the new house.
For example, when I move (and I'll move a lot), I contract packers, shippers and all other "helpers" that I can find. I would not call a friend and ask him/her to help me pack/unpack/move.
On the other hand, if someone remembers to bring me a sandwich while I supervise the movers, I will be very grateful. And likewise, it will be much more likely for you to find me bringing a treat for those who are working, than to see me unpacking dishes and glasses in a friend's kitchen.
But all this "bla bla bla" and these lame excuses are to say that I would like to be more generous and really help people.
It is easy to help when such help does not cost you anything, does not disturb your routine. If you are already doing somethuing, you can do it to your friend too.
The thing is to help others when you do not want / do not like / would not be doing that anyway.
Taking care of the little child that you like is easy. But to be generous and take care of that twat who shouts all the time, is another thing all together. That shows real generosity.
Giving someone a ride to a place you are going anyway does not score you any points, but to cross town at rush hour to help that friend who is stuck there is to be generous.
In my "generosity"list you easily find things like going out at dawn to help someone in an emergency, listen to that friend who needs my lap / attention / affection until the wee hours of the morning, even when my family is hysterical because they think I like my friends best, stay in the hospital with someone, help with family dramas ... all this things are easy for me.
My problem is to help others with things I would not ask for help myself.
Can I call a taxi? So I'm not going to call that friend to come pick me up / take me there.
Can i do it myself? I will spare the friend.
Can I pay someone to do it for me? No friends requested ...
But I also know that not everyone thinks like me, and that perhaps this business of being generous has more to do with what the "other" thinks is important and not what I think is important ...